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How to Enjoy Your Valentine’s Day with Kids and Still Get Laid in 5 Easy Steps!

Ok, let’s be honest. Valentine’s Day isn’t what it used to be. Before kids, my husband and I had the textbook Valentine’s Day. Flowers, romantic dinner, chocolate covered strawberries, and the obligatory lingerie…we did the whole shebang. Kids changed the game. Our romantic dinner has changed to a family pizza night, some kid approved movie, and little people that only eat the chocolate off the overpriced chocolate covered strawberries.

So how do we incorporate the romance back into Valentine’s Day? Well, when there is a will. There is a way.
1. Let’s start small.

First thing, in the morning my husband and I make love. Why? Because let’s be honest, by the end of the day we’re probably going to be way too exhausted to have sex. So, morning sex it is even if we need to wake up a ½ hour early. Have you ever heard the saying, “Get it in when you can fit it in.”

I think it’s more reserved for things like trying to exercise, but in my book, sex counts as cardio if you do it vigorously enough.

2. If you have young children…

…like we do very often our day is full juggling multiple Valentine’s Day parties. So somewhere in the multiple texts that my husband and I exchange during the day while coordinating kid pick-ups and drop offs I surprise him with a NSFW pic. While I am getting dressed in the morning I slip on a little something sexy and take a picture. Sending it when he least expects it is the best part.

“Oh, you’re in a meeting? Here’s a little pic of me in that little black number you like.”

If you’re shy about sending pics maybe a hint is all he needs. Slip on some fishnet thigh highs and send just a picture of your legs in your favorite “fuck me” heels. Trust me, if he is anything like my husband he will not be offended.

3. Phone a friend.

Sometimes you need to call in reinforcements and this is where your friends and family come in. Use those playdates, grandparents, and babysitters to your advantage. The key is to pick your time wisely. You have to assume that everyone else will have Valentine’s Day plans of their own, so yours may need to be an afternoon or you may need to celebrate a week early.

Prime example, my parents have been married for almost fifty years and always have an evening out planned. Last year the only time I could find for the two of us to get away and have them watch the kids for us was the weekend prior to Valentine’s. I booked a hotel room for an overnight and from check-in until check-out we never left the room. No, we didn’t have sex the entire time but, we did have uninterrupted conversations, watched adult movies (yes, those movies. Don’t you judge me!) and slept in the next morning until room service arrived.

4. Even though dinner will probably be pizza…

…with the kids, after we put them to bed we open a bottle of wine and just enjoy the quiet. A little music, conversation, and cuddling is sometimes all we need. If it all leads somewhere, great. If not, that’s fine too.

Being intimate is not JUST about having sex.

5. Finally, don’t wait for fucking Valentine’s Day to be romantic or get laid for that matter!

Steps #1-4 are all things that you should be doing with your partner the other 364 days out of the year. Fit in the weekends away when you can, exchange a couple of dirty text messages, make love first thing in the morning… It’s so important that all the little things you do to make one another feel special on Valentine’s Day are things you should be doing anyway

Trust me, pick a random Tuesday to do any of the above. I would love to know how it works out for you.

About the author

Diedre Barksdale-Garcia

Host of the "Let's Just NOT..." Podcast

Diedre is known for sharing relatable and funny stories about Life, Mommyhood, Marriage, Relationships and SEX! She has helped so many women find balance in the most un-balanced times, become more confident in who they are and challenge the motherhood taboos.

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