We all have that one thing in our life that is not the way we would want it to be, feel, or look like. It is causing us frustrations, stress, pain or even anger every time we deal with it, experience it on a daily basis or think of it.
The one thing I always teach to my coaching clients is that frustrations have a purpose and they can serve us greatly to grow in life and make needed changes for the better. Frustrations are actually perfect indicators that are showing us what we do not like about our life and what we need to change (as soon as possible) in order to be happier and live more fulfilled lives.
It’s really simple the things that frustrate us the most are giving us the best clarity about what is missing in our life and what we really deeply are craving for. They are showing us what is it that we want the most.
The exact opposite of our deepest frustrations are the things we want and need the most in our life. Frustrations are like red flags and they can serve us as a roadmap in the direction of life we deeply want to live.
If you are stressed about your job, if going to work or doing what you’re currently doing is causing you pain, worries, dullness, grief, irritations, frustrations… that is an indicator that you are doing the wrong job. Deep inside your soul you are craving to do something else, you need to change your job or career, because the current one is obviously making you unhappy and drained.
If you are not happy with a man you are in a relationship with and that makes you frustrated very often, that is the indicator that you are not with the right man, or that there is something you are missing in your relationship (trust, emotional bond, security, passion you previously had, understanding, support… or something else).
If you are frustrated about money all the time, that is an indicator that you are actually craving financial security and freedom to experience and enjoy all the things that are bringing you joy ( be it traveling, your own home, education for your dream job or branded bags or shoes).
Here are the steps you can take to turn your frustrations into a fuel to grow and live the life of your dreams:
1. Get the courage to see the truth
It is really important to take some time for self-reflection, dive deep within and be honest with yourself. What is making you the most frustrated in your life right now? Once you identify that, it is time to tell yourself the truth, what is it that you are really missing in your life? What would make you happier? It is sometimes hard to admit that we are craving more money (especially if we identify ourselves as a spiritual person) or that we are missing trust or deeper connection in our relationship (about which we are convincing ourselves and others that is “perfect”). Call the things by their real name and get the clarity about what is it that you really need and want in your life!
2. Decide that you will not tolerate things that are making you unhappy
If you change nothing, nothing will change. Now that you know what is it that you are really missing in your life and what you deep within are craving for and want the most, it is time to take the required action to get that thing, whether it be more money, better relationship, another job, losing weight, moving to another place or traveling. You’re the only one that has the power to make changes and you need to decide that you will not tolerate anymore things that are making you unhappy and frustrated!
3. Work with a life coach
Working with a life coach can help you to get the clarity about your desired goals, what you can change and what changes you can make in your life right now, with the resources (money, time, people) which you currently have. A life coach will help you to set realistic and doable action plans to make the changes in your life in the shortest time possible and in the most effective way, so that you do not waste time and money or have to learn from your own mistakes.
I love the definition of the word pain by spiritual teacher Iyanla Vanzante. (“Pay Attention Inwards Now”). Whenever we experience pain, hardships, frustrations… that is the warning sign that we need to pay attention inwards and remove ourselves form the painful situation!