Why don’t I have one yet?
Spontaneous weekend poolside in Vegas!
Why can’t I do that?
Newest cell phone!
Why is mine 3 years old?
Anyone else have these internal battles and barely even realize it anymore? Well, you’re not alone.
I am guilty of being envious of my friends and families. The whole ordeal of ‘why do they have that but I don’t?’, or ‘well she got to do that, why can’t I?’ Social media can be a great inspiration for new ideas and great connections. What’s really happening, however, is that you are unintentionally, and often unknowingly, comparing yourself and your situation to that of someone completely different.
People are even becoming socially depressed because they think their lives are inferior to their peers.
Remember, social media is often just someone’s highlight reel.
It is downright impossible to compete and compare your life with others highlights. No one is going to post about that time their baby puked on them while they were multitasking trying to be super mom. No one is going to post about that fight they had with their partner last night, even when half way through they realized they kind of started it for no reason and know they were being a little crazy. No, they will post the cute, happy baby pictures and that photo of the “for no reason flowers” they’re adoring partner just sent them. While it’s great to see the highlights of people’s lives, it can be easy to constantly compare yourself and your own life.
Here’s a tip for the new year, GET OFF SOCIAL MEDIA, or at least the parts of it that make you feel inferior.
The people you follow should make you feel empowered and inspired. Social media can make you feel great if you follow the right people. Surround yourself and your daily life with uplifting people. You should never scroll down and question why your friend has a perfect brand new house, but you don’t. Or why the girl you grew up with seems to have the latest greatest tech gadget with the flashy watch and perfect outfits that never seem to repeat. Stop questioning everything! That ‘perfect house’ might be over the couple’s budget which causes them to have financial struggles and nightly fights. Same with the girl who has everything, her credit debt could be astronomical, but you would never know that because they aren’t going to post about it!
Instead, shift your focus to your own life and the things you do have. So you don’t have a house, but you make it a point each year to travel to a place you have never been. So you don’t have to latest smartwatch, but it’s hard to keep track of time with all the things you have planned anyways. So your wardrobe has consisted of the same flip flops for the past 6 years, but you’d rather feel the sand between your toes.
If you are truly happy with who you are and happy with your relationships, then just live in that happiness.
This year commit to focusing on you. Once you remove the negative influences in your life, for me it was Facebook, you find that you invest so much more in YOURSELF! I left Facebook about 6 months ago, and in that 6 months I have re-discovered my love for reading, realized that even though I love my friends, many of them brought me down, and realized my priorities are different than others and that’s okay. I was able to get more focused on my passions and goals and how to align my life with them.
By removing the negativity, I have made more room for self-improvement. I have followed people who make me want to grow, and who inspire me to create my own path. So what if on paper it seems like everyone else has it figured out, THEY’RE NOT YOU! Are you happy with your choices? If yes, then focus on that happiness. If no, then change something. But whatever you do, do it for you! Love yourself, love your partner, and live for that happiness. Don’t live in the ‘whys’ from above, live in the now and the future of your success and ways to let your inner beauty flourish. Remember, everyone has their own path, so just because you are hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, and all your friends are strolling on the beach, doesn’t make either path right or wrong.
Stop comparing your life to others as it will only halt your growth and happiness.