Where Judgment Comes from and How to Recover - The Ladies Coach

Where Judgment Comes from and How to Recover

by Tandar Tanavoli

Judgment is like a dark cloud hovering over your head. Wherever you go it’s there, following you around. At times it feels like you have nowhere else to go but to learn to live with it! How did you get here in the first place?

You know it wasn’t always like this you but just can’t figure out how you got trapped in all of this and don’t know how to end it. It’s just exhausting constantly being watched and judged for all that you say, do, wear, eat, play, etc.

Here’s something to think about:

The most important step in the case of “You vs. Judgment” is to understand your opponent first. After those solutions come pouring in and when your action takes place, the issue at hand will become nothing but a pure lesson from the past.

The formula is pretty simple but many get caught up and overwhelmed with what’s right in front of them and not see beyond.

Here’s something else you might not have realized till this very moment: As a result of being judged, most people become judgmental themselves! It’s time to break the cycle and make a difference in your life and in the lives of others.

The beauty of this process is that you’ll not only eliminate your own pain, but you can share the formula with others and help release their pain too.

So let’s learn and understand judgment:

Why people judge?

The root of anything that causes pain is fear. Fear of being seen as insecure or weak. Fear of not being good enough. Fear of failure or success. Fear of not being smart… This list can go on and on.

What’s the outcome of judgment?

A dead end, of course! It only hurts another being and pushes them deeper into judging themselves. There’s no kindness in judgment and no solution either. It’s just another way of pulling someone down to where you’re standing so you don’t feel bad about yourself for your own lack of action. It’s the ultimate waste of everyone’s time.

How to eliminate it?

That’s the simple part! When you take something out of an equation, you have to replace it with another.

Since we are taking “judgment” out, the replacements would be:

Stick to the truth

You’re the only one who knows all of you. Love every side of you. You wouldn’t hurt and judge your best friend, right?

Rise above it all

If someone inflicts pain, they are in pain. See their pain, but don’t become one with it. What do you do when you see someone in pain? Do just that.


This part get’s easier after you see and feel their pain. You don’t kick someone in pain who’s on the ground, right? Instead, extend a helping hand. If you can’t at that moment, just walk away. You’ve found your way and just hope they will find theirs too.

As Gabby Bernstein said it best just recently:

“I choose to judge nothing that occurs.”

Make that choice!
It’s all yours to make.

Tandar Tanavoli

about the author

Tandar Tanavoli

Tandar Tanavoli is a certified motivational & lifestyle coach of both Anthony Robbins' Mastery University & Erickson Coaching College. Her work helps with all aspects of life: health, relationships, career, etc.
For more info please visit: www.tandartanavoli.com.


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