7 Keys for Finding True Love and Happiness - The Ladies Coach

7 Keys for Finding True Love and Happiness

by Renee Slansky

Is it even possible to find true love and happiness? If so, what are we missing? Here are 7 keys for that will help you on your journey.

1: Know your true value 

The greatest love you could ever invest in is the love that you have for yourself. This isn’t about spending money on your physical appearance or becoming arrogant and self-absorbed. It’s about knowing your true value as a woman and living your life in accordance to what you are deserving of.

The way in which we let people treat us is usually a reflection of how we see and values ourselves. So often to others (not necessarily ourselves), it becomes quite evident of how much self-love we really have. Once you know you worth you’ll stop giving discounts and start to feel whole and happy even as a singleton.

2: Live a life you love daily

The best thing about life is that the majority of us were born with a choice of how to live it. It’s easy to get caught up in the busyness of everyday routine, we can often feel like we are getting stuck in a rut and waiting for the next opportunity instead of actively seeking it out. However, the only person stopping you from creating a life you actually love is yourself! When you build a life you don’t want to take a holiday from, you will find that daily existence also becomes a joy. Simple steps and choices all work together to form the ideal reality that you really long for, so start today by making better decisions and having an understanding that it is possible to love life every day.

3: Declutter and get organized

When your environment is full of rubbish, turmoil and chaos, it usually reflects that your life, mind and spirit is too. By cleaning out the old, you are effectively giving the new permission to enter in.  Even if you feel like your head and heart are all over the place, you can at least bring a sense of order to your home and personal space by organizing and decluttering the space. It’s amazing how our home and surroundings can really affect our mood. So get rid of anything negative or unnecessary and start creating a new physical foundation to build on which makes you feel at peace, in control and positive.

4: Write a list of what you want

Life and love is difficult enough without us having to wander through it without a clue of where we are actually going! Grab a pen and piece of paper, or a computer and start writing out what it is you want in life! Be honest, get down to the nitty gritty and be specific, this is your life we are talking about after all. The lists I like to write to give myself clarity and a sense of direction are:

  • Yearly goals of what I want to achieve
  • A list of who I am and what I have to offer to the world
  • A list of my dreams and the purpose and passions I have
  • A list of the dream relationship I am deserving of
  • A list of the dream man I hope to marry!

Don’t limit yourself, write more if you feel the need to, just put them somewhere where you can see them daily and be reminded of what you are waiting, fighting and dreaming for!

5: Learn the difference between compromising and settling

Love isn’t meant to be second rate and hence why you shouldn’t have to settle for second best. We tend to get confused or complacent after a few bad relationships, heartache or years of waiting, and so we forget out value and what we are deserving of.  On the opposite hand, when your expectations are so high that you can forget to be flexible and compromise in a healthy way. Know the difference ladies, know your worth, then you will find the balance that you are after.

6: Know when to chase, and when to wait.

We live in a fast pace society and often become impatient when things don’t come in our timing. It’s hard to wait for the real thing when we have access to so many other second-rate options along the way (although at the time, we don’t see them as second-rate, but rather an answer to a need we have). Chasing men will get you nowhere, chasing dreams, on the other hand, will see to it that you live in your potential and are filled with purpose. By all means, we need to still initiate things with males (unless we want to die alone with 42 cats) but we also need to know where boundaries need to be set. Sometimes when you put down the good, it’s because you are meant to pick up the great, so don’t be afraid to wait for a little.

7: Nurture what you have.

It’s so important to understand not only your self-worth but also the worth of what good things you have in your life. Relationships take consistent hard work daily and they need to be fed and watered to continue growing healthily. Don’t neglect yourself, your health, your appearance or your partner! Try to be conscious of every decision you make, the words you speak and the actions you make; it’s not easy but the reward will be worth it!  When we appreciate and nurture what we have been given (including our own life ) we, in turn, live with more gratitude, joy, and peace.

Renee Slansky

about the author

Renee Slansky

Renee Slansky is an Australian established TV presenter, writer and professional  blogger  who’s love for romance and heart for women compelled her to start her online community http://www.thedatingdirectory.co .

From a young age she started leading and counselling women and was often called on by strangers and friends for relationship advice. With no professional training but rather what she picked up in experience, teachings and observation, her writings offer a witty and relative outlook with practical advice on life and romance in the 21st century.

Erin L. SAYS:

Great article! I especially agree that in order to find true love, you must first love yourself and get your life together. We often expect others to give us what we can find within ourselves. Again, great post!

weetjij SAYS:

You won’t feel conscious in front of them. You will feel just as good as you feel in front of your friends. You will go out of your way to help that person who holds a special place in your heart. For example, if your love is sick or needs you, you won’t care if their home is too far. You will just reach their home as soon as you can to console them or to help them out.

Ankita SAYS:

Very insightful post, and pretty funny too! Yeah, true love does bring you back to reality, and there’s no such thing as love at first sight… only attraction! It’s not me being cynical, it’s just the truth.
It’s ironic that I’m commenting on a post about love since I just finished writing a post about a director who generally keeps a safe distance from it! ????


I had a 14 years relationship before. She had an affair twice with the same guy. We separated for a year now. After a year passed.
After a year passed, I have a girlfriend now, but I feel like something is missing. Im sure it’s love. I dont want to hurt her. I just want to make her happy. But inside me it’s not. I dont know what to do anymore. I know im idiot. 🙁

Blessing SAYS:

What a great article,I love it, I now understand you need to love yourself before you can find true love

Anonymous SAYS:

Well many of us men have to stay away from women that have their very high unrealistic expectations, and very high standards today.

Leslie SAYS:

I must disagree with Ankita. Love at first sight does happen. I have an aunt that had it happen twice in her life. She had an instantaneous connection with my uncle that went far beyond mere attraction. They both knew immediately and were married 45 years Until his death. At the age of 77 it happened to her again. ( lucky duck). I also know 2 couples that had the same instantaneous connection. It goes beyond just physical. If it happens to you, you’re very lucky.

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