Why do women always like the BAD BOYS? Isn’t this the question we’ve had since forever.
I would like to shed a light on this topic and say that finding a bad boy is necessary if you want any passion, attraction, and intimacy. However, the confusion lies with the extreme differences women don’t seem to understand between the good bad and the bad BAD. Hopefully, in this article, I can help differentiate the two allowing the capacity for a raw, beautiful and authentic relationship instead of a relationship that, may seem exciting at first, but causes extreme pain throughout its course.
One of the majestic and beautiful qualities of a woman is the natural capacity to be nurturers and lovers. We have the ability to feel what others are feeling, truly care about helping and serving and usually put ourselves last. With that said, aren’t there times we just want a break from feeling all the time? One would understand that all we want is someone to come in, carefree, and take us (even temporarily) away from having to worry about what others are feeling.
Well, that’s when Mr. Bad Boy enters your life. It could be in a bar, a social gathering, at work or maybe through friends. You see him and know there is something mysterious, intriguing and unbelievably attractive about him.
You sense an energy you don’t normally feel. His confidence takes you out of your nurture mode into a feeling of lust and intrigue. You go down a fast track of heated passion and addiction to this energy. Almost as if you are under a spell of some sort!… Until you realize the flame of passion starts to dim and the true nature of this person begins to shine brighter.
A side that is less attractive than what you originally saw. You start to notice the intrigue and excitement you once had, have now turned into insecurity and worry. “Why won’t he commit to me?” “Why are my feelings one-sided?” “Why doesn’t he want to be with me anymore?”
How many of you started reading this with excitement but started to feel depressed after reading the paragraph above?
That’s what happens when you get into a relationship with a bad boy who is ONLY a “bad boy.” It starts off at a high peak, and then before you know it, crashes before you ever knew what happened. Ladies, I’m all about that out of control feeling of passion in a relationship, but I also know that passion should be something that grows and blossoms. NOT something that crashes into pain, insecurity, and toxicity.
Now, this is where you want to take notes because I am going to tell you the key to sustainable passion, or another way to say it is, finding the BAD boy in a GOOD man.
Notice the words that are highlighted above, “BAD” and “GOOD” this is to reference light and dark energy. Light and dark energy is so crucial for life. Every human being has light and dark parts of themselves although we are not taught to embrace the darkness within ourselves most of the time.
Most of us are taught to be good girls, give to others and do everything right that we suppress the wanting, the taking and naughty parts of ourselves until someone who embodies that energy comes along and helps you (hence the irresistible factor of bad boys) but the goal is to find a MAN who embodies both of these energies, not just his dark.
Here is a small example of Light and Dark energy in a relationship for Man and Woman:
Woman’s Light Energy:
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Nurturer
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Caretaker
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Loving
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Friend
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Mother
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Wife
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Goddess
Woman’s Dark Energy:
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Temptress
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Seductress
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Taker
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Pleasure seeker
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Sex Goddess
Man’s Light Energy:
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Provider
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Father
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Supporter
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Gentle
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Kind
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Honorable
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Loving
Man’s Dark Energy:
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Taker
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Ravager
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Pleasure seeker
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Mysterious
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Knight
To find a man who knows how to live in his light energy is so important if you want to be able to feel safe and free to “play” in the dark. Most importantly, you need to feel comfortable accessing the deep, dark, beautiful and sexual parts of yourself making it less taboo and allowing your spirit to be free.
When your spirit is free and you are living in your truth, you will be able to attract a GOOD man who has a BAD boy Knight to play with the Temptress that’s inside of you.
Don’t you want a man who has your best interests at heart, will care love and worship you, but also… Ravage you? That’s what sustains passion, my friends. Embodying both of your energy sources in yourself as well as in another. Sustainable passion comes from embodying both light and dark energies, and when you choose “Bad boys,” who are only bad, it won’t be long till that temporary passion comes down in smoke.
So what do I do?
You may be single and wondering why you always like bad boys, or you may be in a relationship wondering how you can bring out the bad boy in your man. Like I said, wherever you’re at is perfect but remember, I’m here to help you no matter what the circumstance is. So feel free to leave a COMMENT BELOW or write ask me a follow up question!
Ernie Salgado SAYS:
Bad Boy Image…. Good boy mentality…..sometimes….